Monday, December 15, 2008

My people wassup? Mehn I am tired, tired and horny...wait first, lemme sexplain...sorry Today was our first day at our new building in a new city. You know I said my company moved and all that. So we got to the place today sha, it was tight, tight place to work, etc..but since it was an open space, I had to be careful wetin I dey look for internet, so all those crazy posts on some Nigerian forums like.. "Is virginity a good thing" were out of the question, and of course afrobabes blog was out of the question, before one stiff dutch man sees one picture and gets me
Men, its like those winches from my village sent them again oo...hmm, as I was in my new office chilling like the good boi that I am, I saw this chick...well she was older, but men, orobo, big,the way I like them, in a miniskirt again, plus leggings, ahh, next thing anaconda just began to see the binding and casting I use for the tin...readers, why is it that snakes are so hard to tame, ehn?
I sha removed my eyes, u know, this celibacy of a thing, can be hard especially for someone like me, but well I dey tell myself say na for good cause.
Then after lunch I saw her again, bent over, the miniskirt hugging her backside, as she was pushing something..kai, no be something sef me I wan push? lol...and she had specs again, and was looking serious...secretary fantasy anyone? lol
Next thing I went to the coffee machine to get myself some coffee, or was it to use the bathroom, I can't thing my hot-chick-sense (as opposed to spider sense) went off, I just turned to see one bakassi sticking out of a door...then the bakassi moved, and the owner of the bakassi revealed it was one of these Moroccan immigrants, fine...and so anaconda begin dey yarn me:

Anaconda: wavemasta, no mess up ooooo, no mess up...
wavemasta: Dude, cmon celibacy..wait sef, how u take wake up
Anaconda: bros leave that thing, just step to the chick tell am salaam aleikum, yarn am some deep koko like dbanj, she go chop am...shebi na foreigner?
wavemasta: oloshi, I bind you..

After this conversation, I went back to "work" sha, then we had lunch, the seats were so soft, it was like making love to my body, this is why I love big I miss my chick ooo... and I love naija women in general, all my big sistas, but I can't marry you all, can I, even if I take enuff blood tonic..madam go do me strong
Ok fastforward to me walking around looking for a secretary ok look this time it was thing, my senses go off again...what on earth is wrong with this place? Ol boi, the next chick I saw taking some coffee from the, she could give some naija chicks a run for their money in the ikebe department...while I was still cum-templating, she looks at me and goes.. "Hello"....ahhh anaconda was about to be fully know I have locked up the snake till his owner is around...but men at times, especially in situations, he begins to stir, waiting for a chink in my Armour...but I AM STRONG! Amen brother!
Ol boi, after that hello, I just went and sat down jejely. Hmm, seems these chicks here might be verrry friendly after all, and language might not be a barrier. After all, "I want you", can be translated into many languages.
But men, seriously, what will I gain...especially in the light of what I really want from a relationship, and from life in general?
But omo those chicks set
On how this place affects us, I got a facebook message from a guy living here who told me he was gonna run nuts, he'd been here working for a major company, which if you mention its name some naija chicks would screw you silly, right there and then...and said he hadn't met any Nigerians, and he was just in his own world, and all...and we had a mutual friend, so we talked, connected.He sounded like he was really going to lose it. Anyways he told me he'd go to naija for xmas to see his chick,(lucky bastard), me wey I never come home for over 2 yrs, well sha, he'd come see me maybe around new years day...he told me about some dutch dude working in the same company who committed suicide. And he told me "seriously, there's more to life than working for a good company...everything else has to be in balance"...and I totally agree. In naija we believe that once we "make it", by getting the cushy job, etc, then all our problems will be solved....that's not it.
I remember looking at my GPA of a first class, my first year in university back in naija and asking myself "Is this all there is?"
I now have hustled, gotten my MSc, and yeah am working here in a comfy job, but I still feel the emptiness inside...and no its not because I don't have Jesus...its that through no fault of anyone..the bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh isn't here..that special someone I can be vulnerable with....
And no amount of fake sex can erase that, or compensate for that....the loneliness can be killing, the lack of intimacy. Yes even as crazy randy as I am..I know whats up. I take refuge in God and pray and all...but at times you ask yourself.."Is this all there is?"
God knew what he was saying when he said "It's not good for man/woman to be alone".
So I felt my brother, so I understood where he was coming from. You gotta be strong minded to survive here.
I even met one of my naija guys here, the guy dey yarn me say I don dey here for 2 yrs say wetin, say make I go home.. I told him I would go next year anyways.
I know that if I am not single, men no chick go catch me lai if I am not, men, na God oo, biko... let me not count when last I released anaconda.
Oh, and the "no chick can catch me part?" Abeg, this isn't an invite to tempt me, abeg, joo, sorry ooo, to whoever might decide to take it personally. Hehe.
But it's all good...we go dey rock am dey go...naija no dey carry last.
Overall, work was good, I had fun, nice perks.. now 2moro it's the same thing.Argggh!
Make I go rest.
Laterz guyz!


Funms-the rebirth said...

lol @ ur post...........
yea theres def. more to life than a good job and all...... hey keep taming! ur babe deserves it......

badderchic said...


badderchic said...

Im not happy, lol at you scoping non Naija booty's

take it easy sha o!

Anonymous said...

Awww! I am so proud of you. You can look all you want o but just dont touch men. 2 years without. You are strong o! And yeah life is not all about money or a good job, although those things are important to your level. contentment! Thats what it is all about. Contentment!

miz-cynic said...

first time here.....not bad!i like...ill be off to read more of ur posts.and my sis is always complaining tht thr are not enuff men wu like big women!.i wish thr were more of u for her

Afam Anigbo said...

Yoshimitsu was bound for 2 years?


Central 69 will meet dis evening cumcerning the disrespect u show towards ur zanpakutoh...

wavemasta said...

Guys ok, I didnt abstain for 2 years, lets just say its bin like 8 months.... and it will soon be 9...
@Temite: Thanks a lot..I no go touch no
@mz-cynic- tell your sister not to worry, there are so many of us plus side lady lovers out
@Afam..central 69 made me bind my zanpaktou...twas causin too much damage
@funms...yeah ure right ooo, I dey try
@Badderchic....I'm reading ur blog rite now...I cudnt read it at work for obvious

Afrobabe said...

And no amount of fake sex can erase that, or compensate for that....the loneliness can be killing, the lack of intimacy. Yes even as crazy randy as I am..I know whats up.

yep...that sums up my mind right now....I feel empty...

lol @ u not being able to visit might be surprised at how many friends you'll make based on being caught at mine...

leave all those non naija booty film trick!!!