Saturday, July 28, 2007


Hey todays my birthday..............Im so so grateful to God for allowing me to see another year, its not been easy. Some pple slept in their beds yesterday and all, and didnt wake up, but your friendly neighbourhood crazy nerd is here, and its just by the grace of God. And also, in 3 days time, it will be exactly one year since omo boy departed the shores of naija, via klm into the unknown, not knowing what the future would hold. Mennn this life sef, we cannot fathom or understand it, its just in Gods hands. I hear someone asking me how old I am, and Im like............."A year older." A typical naija reply. I never knew how my life would transform and all, just by coming here, I have grown ,and found out stuff about myself I didnt know existed.
Anyways enough of the philosophical yarns. Im sure pple would want to know what went down with me today. Well I went to my friend G's room. G is from east africa, and he has just finished his masters program. I went to G's room to pick up some stuff, and basically G began yarning about his favorite subject.......... yeah you guessed it....chix. Basically G has a fiancee and all, but sees nuttin wrong in bonkin everythin in skirts. So after G began telling me about another east african chic he'd bin bonking, who was also engaged my blood began to run cold. Next thing, G began yarning about one chick who had someone back home, as in a husband oh, officially. G was like this chick was just bonking around, and the hubby supposedly flew over here for her graduation. I hate hearing stuff like that, cus well a select few will know that Im undergoing a transformation process so that I can view the females with a nice normal eye. I am tired of pple telling me that women cannot be decent, and that given the right circumstances, they can cheat. G is like "men dont say so and so cannot cheat, cus men u dont know what can happen".
Anyways G tells me about a carnival taking place in rotterdam, and since I needed to change my environment and get outta here fast, I accepted his invitation, and your crazy nerd sprayed his Armani perf (yeah u know I dey represent), and we went to the carnival.
The carnival was so so cool. A lot of music, a lot of chicks, dancing, shaking, gyrating. All sizes, and all shapes, and all colors. Lepa, orobo, black, white, mixed race, etc, it was too mush, (quoting lord of ajasa). Men we saw so many things, that cant be described, all I can tell you is that Im sure you wouldnt want your daughter shaking like that in a custume on the streets, lol.
Next thing, G and I entered into another chicks discussion again. Now yeah I know say I be eficco, and I sabi somethings. Some people even dey say that I be ekun. (but well thats their own), but men I also love Jesus like it or not, and yeah I knew I wanted outta the whole game. Cus it was so senseless. Just random screwing, without any meaning, so I had made up my mind that by Gods grace oh, I should just make my money, and get a wifey, so I can do all the naughhty things I like to do......legitimately.
G was just laffing at me and telling me that look, hes 10 years older than I am and has seen things. He told me, hed seen pastors, ministers, basically screwing around like mad, and that I was speaking from a theoretical point of view. He was telling me that he deals with the practical aspect, and that when it came to software, and programming, and mathematics, that yeah I could definitely say that 1+1=2. But that in real life, I couldnt say that cus stuff could always happen. He told me I should just pray to God that please oh abeg, dont let me do this. Cus he was like, you can just find yourself doing stuff you never imagined.
I chewed on this for a moment, and I realized that even though I mightnt agree with him on all fronts, this dude did have a point. You cannot say for certain that, yeah Im not gonna do this, or that, cus we are all human, and stuff can happen given the right conditions. I remember doing stuff that I never thot I could do or imagined I could do. I remember finding out that the real world was much different than what you read about in a xtian book or head from someone. Its realli crazy. I remember having so many problems with xtianity and all , cus people never talk about the human side of things, they simply make you feel guilty about stuff, that they do and enjoy.
So well I saw things from G's point of view. I mean just imagine yourself, a man, you just had a fight with your wifey, you go for a drive in your Ikoyi estate, then you see this hot mamacita, that you knew had the hots for you, and you guys had bin kinda close. You pull over, and talk to her, she asks you if things are ok. You drive over to her place, she pours you a drink, and listens to your problems. You bow your head from sorrow, she drops the drink shes holding and comforts you, then you raise up your head and kiss her, clothes come off and all, and yeah you do the math................
10 mins later, you are like OMG, WTF did I just do? yeah you heard, you just cheated on your wifey. Damn, shit happens. Next thing you know you get sucked in. She shows you attention , and listens to you and shit gets deep, and yeah you choose to ignore the lil voice inside you telling u you gotta stop this.....
Sometimes we human beings have our heads so far up in the clouds that we forget that its only the grace of God that keeps us safe, and that things can happen. I am not endorsing wrong behavior, Im just saying that we should remember that when we point one finger at someone, 3 fingers are pointing back at us.
Before you judge someone, Mr pastor, holy person, or an average person like me, put yourself in this persons shoes, and ask yourself..........What if it was me? what would I have done?
I had this problem, and God just showed it to me, and Im taking steps dealing with it, even though its so so painful at times. We make excuses for our own behaviour, and we show no mercy to others for the same mistake. We expect perfection, and we are not perfect.
Guys expect to marry virgins, when they have basically acted porn scene movies with other peoples future wives.......I hear someone say "wavemasta thats the way the world works", but I say that if thats how the world works, then it sucks. Big time.
I told G that Id never cheat on my wife, and he told me to talk to him in 6 yrs time, after I had worked for like 3 different companies. I told him I still believed in family values, In love, and honesty. Im not saying my wifey should be perfect and all, but men, cmon, I still believe in love dammit! Am I old fashioned somebody?
Im not a saint or a JJC. Ive bin around, and I aint proud of it, but cmon, I know that if Im in love with you then I wouldnt wanna hurt you, no matter what.........but G tells me that I like too much
G reminded me of what I said when I first came here, that I wanted to do all the assignments myself, naija style and finish all the courses next year. I told him that yeah I sojied well well and found out that they wanted us to do teamwork and besides I couldnt do everything on my own, and that I had finished all but 2 courses of the coursework. G told me that I can now see that what I said I would do was different from what I actually did, and that when it came to real life, never say never.
Well my elder bros and family came around, and gave me a present,and I felt good.They also made me re-affirm my belief to get a dinstinction from here cus men, I need cash, cold hard cash, ego, kudi, owo, benjamins, I can be financially independent , and organize madam (wink wink)
On my way back from seeing them off I stopped by a friends room, a dude from chile called alex, and his friend carlos. They had some beers, and were watching a movie, and when I told them it was my bday han han u suppose know now......dem organise shayo for son of I dont shayo too much and not too often but today I was like abeg after a beer we begin dey yab batman and why hes so rich and all. After a second, we began gisting about our futures. Men guys shayo is hard core spiritual shit oh, it makes you yarn the
Well Im back in my crib, typing this, wondering how my life will turn out, and if I will overcome all my inner battles, especially with religion, and pple judging each other. Wonder if I will ever get to the point where I look at a chick as who she is now , and not what she did before......well sha God dey, and I go make the song says.
Thanks to all the guys who remembered my bday, all my ex Lag guys, and babes, both in naija and beyond..........God bless you and may u live longer......And to my familia, the same goes!!
I gotta go guys, take care!

Monday, July 23, 2007

Well im alive and all, and still doin my thang. I will post something later, but I got this new video by tuface, check it out, and tell me what you all think. Wonder whats up with the ghana wear, some dudes were yabbing him that he wasnt properly repping, well I guess its all abt perspective.

Wavemasta out.....

Sunday, July 22, 2007

Well I went to church today. Shit has been really going down, and I felt I needed God more than ever.My parents cancelled my trip to france for crazy parental reasons, telling me its for "safety" reasons, and that was after they had agreed and I had spent 70 euros on a discount card, allowing me to ride the dutch trains, and also the international trains with a discount. And I was meant to buy my ticket today.
I received the text message when I was watching Pirates of the caribbean 3 (Which in my own honest humble opinion is crap). I went to the movie to get my mind of some issues with me concerning, my life, academics, and madam, and this text came in. When I get texts from pupcy, I can be sure its gonna ruin my day. He now began telling me they want me to to travel in a group, after everyones left, and here people are on their own and all, and Id already planned stuff. I called them and he and mumcy began this tag team crap, telling me that I hadnt done my research well about travelling, and Im acting as if they havent been abroad before and blah blah. Anyways I got pissed and just called the whole thing off, which was what they wanted.
I mailed my siblings, and all, and talked to my shrink and madam. When I felt better I just sent them a text telling them fine, I'd do what they wanted. I got a text from them telling me God bless me and that there wud be more opportunities. This was after I was happy I was going to change my environment, from this depressing place.
Shebi its for a season? And this program is soon gonna be over. When I get into shell, or schulum, and I just severe all contact, then they go hear wein. Thank God I have decided that academic life isnt for me at all.
Imagine, them still controlling my life, and trying to manipulate me with bible verses like "honor ur mum and dad", and playing my emotions....................infact men im still pissed.
Since Im still partially dependent on them, I had to kiss ass. I was so pissed off yesterday, I was actually slamming my table. I called madam and she calmed me down and all. She was so sweet, but in the light of one of our major problems, the advice seemed, dunno, tainted. I was just like, such a sweet person, and so loving, and yet, shit happened. But thats by the way. I am just happy that July is finally coming to an end, cus this is like one of the worst months of my existence.
If It wasnt for the grace of God, Id have gone mad by now.
Well whateva. Im gonna do some major prayer and fasting. For schizzle.
At least I chopped jollof rice, salad, and chicken, at church today so Im fine. And I have made arrangements to look for a summer job, so well, lemme be positive , and trust God. Its amazing that through all this, I have drawn close to God and Jesus. Well thats why you havent seen headlines saying "Nigerian Student runs mad in room".

Oh, and I got this interesting piece from one of our church services, this is about how the past can affect us now.
Just remember that before you do stuff, whether its sleeping with one chick you just met, drugs, or ure taking advantage of someone, just know that its gonna come back and haunt you one day. And it goes the same way for chicks. Cus when u wanna get married, and you find someone ure in love with, and he hears abt shit uve done, then men, get ready for some crap. Whatever we do today, drugs, insults, crap, etc, can come back to haunt us.
We are all humans, but lets try and live responsibly. Trust me, I know.

Yes I like orobos, but I try to see them as more than sex objects, and I try to handle women responsibly. Im still human though, havent turned into a preacher.

Well Im gonna correct one of my essays. Wish me luck.

Safe y'all.

Wednesday, July 18, 2007

Madam forced me to go out to watch a movie, so I picked up a fellow naija guy, obi, and we both went to the cinema to watch "Transformers". Since I was/am still a huge fan of the series, It was great, and yeah I wasnt dissapointed.
It was nice seeing my favorite robots, like optimus prime, Iron hide, battling the bad guys like megatron, and starscream. But men Megatron transforms into a gun now, han han, whyd they change him? But the producers did a good job of making all the decepticon(bad guys) robots look evil, what with the scary red eyes, and all, as if say all of them don dey weed anyhow. Just imagine if robot dey smoke, kai, if I see that one I go know say judgement day don dey come slowly.
See now I went to see one of my professors this morning about a project replacement for a course I did. Dont want to go into details, but it sha involved one of our partners, deciding that since he did most(ok, all) the work, he wasnt gonna work with us anymore and was gonna do his thing, anyways no hard feelings sha.
So I go meet the prof for a new project and na so the prof dey propose one weird project like this, then he carries me to the office of one other naija guy doin phd under him, and the conversation is like this:

prof: yeah I want you to work with kaz on polynomial (insert freaky shit here)

wavemasta (gulp), er sir , sir, em em you see....

kaz : (speaking in one conc Ibadan/ijesha/whatever accent) yes sir, he is free, we should give him something to occupy him, and make him work for us

wavemasta: (thinking)men no be omo boi go help you do your phd, oh, bone naija connection

prof: ok, see you will submit the thing in august

by this time, I could see my holiday plans goin up in smoke, han han I suppose go france now, I gats to comot from this place

wavemasta: (putting on my best pitiful look) sir, I have an exam in august, and I gotta do compiler construction and all that, besides Ive bin working realli hard and my head has bin aching

Prof(smiling): Its your problem , not mine

wavemasta(Now desperate) : Sir what would Jesus do?

prof (smiling) Jesus is for guys getting close to God. Are you that christian?

wavemasta: yeah but Im still human

prof: In the same way, Im also a christian, but not so christian that I let you off the hook like that

wavemasta (dejected) ok sir

prof (still smiling) ok lets go to my office.

well it ended well, kaz wanted to finsh me ooo, the prof brought out one project, when he began describing it, I was like, men abeg, I no fit.
Kaz was like prof he's a great programmer, so the prof now asked me if I was, and I was like "I try", and the prof accused me of waving too, in no sabi say I be omo naija. Well finally I settled for the research paper, and kaz was like, he can do etc, etc, the prof (God bless him) was like, I'm not asking him to do anything innovative, just to survey the area.
Well I gotta write at least 20 pages, and submit it in september.
At least I get a holiday .
Men today was the day madam was meant to show, if not for those oyinbos (thunda fire them). I just comforted her and let her know we'd still see each other.
Men this love sef, we no sabi am oh.

Well safe, I decided to cook chicken stew, and Its on the fire, and (to madam), mine is berra than yours!!!!
Yeah the money from naija came in yesterday, and son of man is happy. Men its not good to be penniless in a foreign country men. To guys who think studying abroad is all milk and honey, men its not. It involves other things. You need God, prayers, and to be strong.
Enuff of d speeches, later!

Monday, July 16, 2007

Tribulations and Thanksgiving

I havent blogged for ages, because of well stuff I have bein goin through. Its just crazy the way things have been happening, and I dont know where to start....
A zen proverb says that "a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step", so let me start.
Well my chick and I have bin going on fine, except for the fact that yeah we have bin having issues, and its my fault. I blame myself because I always step to my actions, and take responsibility for stuff I do. We have issues relating to stuff she told me abt her past when we were friends and all, but when we got serious and all it began to bug me for some strange reasons and all,and we would argue and all, but the thing was I knew this was from me, and my wahala, and I had to do some work on myself, because I am not gonna sabotage the best thing that has happened to me. And yeah Im making progress, and Im over it now.
That aside , omo boi checked his account and saw like 2 digits. Men I wanted to faint. I decided to play it cool and chill till the beginning of july, men nothin showed,by this time I was desperate because the rent pple had taken their kishi for the month, and nuthin was left,except 2 digits. I went to see my oga, to yarn him the koko. He went and arranged stuff for omo boi, nuthin show for my account oh!
Men Na so your guy begin cook rice and beans for here o! In fact, e no easy.
As of now, dem never pay, but I believe they will.
Thank God madam has bin a source of joy and support. Anyways sha I need to get out of here and take a holiday, somewhere else.
So much has been happening, enuff tribulations, but well I believe in God and the fact that things are gonna work. After all, he got me this far abi?
Also men mumcy dey vex becus of that email I send am last week, I had to call and explain stuff. Anyways sha, I cant go into too many details, but this has bin a trying period for me, and yeah I believe things will get better, like madam always tells me "This is just a phase".
safe y'all

Monday, July 9, 2007

Talk Show

All of you who know me very well know that I have been diagnosed with the deadly disease called LEPACITIS. Its a rare disease common in males. It means that I am not attracted to skinny (lepa) girls at all. When I see them , especially the very very thin ones, I shudder. I wonder how I can lie in bed next to one and touch one, without being scared I'm gonna break her in half.
To promote lepacitis, I created this talk show scenario, where I'm being interviewed by a popular talk show host, and if you study the name, you might guess who she is.

So this is to all my big beautiful sisters out there, who might have been made to feel like freaks , and called names because of the way they look like, or because of their (ehem) "structures"...I love you all.....pity I cant marry you all, cus I dont wanna die early, and I dont support polygamy, but here goes..


kyra: So tonight everyone on this segment, we have.."Men who like their ladies big!!!" And our major guest is wavemasta!!

(audience claps)

wavemasta: thanks kyra, its an honor bein on your show.

kyra: so wavemasta what do you do?

wavemasta: Well Im a programmer, and all round nerd, fine boi, rich kid etc. Check out my geeky glasses.
(audience laughs)

kyra: So wavemasta, tell us, how long have you being, er.....exceptional?

wavemasta: you mean how long I've loved big juicy women?

kyra: yeah

wavemasta: well it all started in secondary school , where I noticed I loved those big ghanian women who sold stuff.....then I noticed I sorta used to blank out thin women, I didnt understand it, but I now know why.

kyra: So wait, you mean u discovered yourself, at a young age

wavemasta: yeah, and when I was doing my A-levels in england, I discovered and accepted it. I felt it was so cool.

kyra: So youve never being with a skinny woman before?

wavemasta: no kyra, cmon, skinny chicks cant take my action. I dont want to be arrested for murder. Look when Im thinking and writing Java code, It activates my joistick, and makes me very very horny. Only a big woman can handle me in my "unleashed" state. I see thin women and I'm

kyra: So what about societies standards on beauty?

wavemasta: Look thats bullshit Miss wanks, seriously. The African concept of beauty is a full figured woman, big in everything, intelligence, size, etc. This concept of beauty being linked to being thin is just a western lie. I remember reading about some colonialists who brought a woman from the bushmen tribe in south africa to europe. She was full figured unlike those stiff european prissy ladies then. They put her in a cage where they would admire her like an animal in a zoo, and she died.


kyra: So do your parents know about your......."preferences"?

wavemasta: Nope. One day my mum was telling me how she'd like an ebony, slim, tall woman for me. Im not sure but I think I remember rejecting it in Jesus Name.

kyra: You called Jesus? Was it that serious?

wavemasta: Kyra, it was as if she was laying a curse on me. Ok check out this scenario, early in the morning, you're just getting up, and your wife walks to the bathroom with nothing on. With a full figured woman, I get to sit up and admire the work of God. If its a thin woman I think I'm just gonna puke.

(at this point, the audience is laughing hysterically)

wavemasta: In fact , I think if God asked me to choose between hell, and marriage to a lepa chick, I'd ask him to lemme take a tour of hell first.You know a brothers gotta check out his options.

(audience is laughing)

wavemasta: when I came back to Lagos, Nigeria for my undergraduate studies, my fellow coursemates used to call me "robosky", cus they observed I only date big (robolicious) women.

kyra: Wow wavemasta, its nice to see a fine, sexy brother like you, loving the large ladies.

wavemasta: I gotta say something....yeah I love em big, but please you also gotta watch your health. Theres a level you get to (being obese), where its bad for your health, and you could get diabetes, and all those bad things. Then you need to go to the gym and work out. But that dosent mean you become an anorexic.
I love ladies who are built like that naturally, and who arent like endangering their health and all.

kyra: So wavemasta, youve never being with a skinny chick before?

wavemasta: No kyra, never. I see them and my body refuses to work. Even when I try inserting tiger batteries inside the joystick, it refuses to rise. But If my sensors detect a woman with the structures, weighing over 70kg, the thing automatically activates itself. Its a miracle, and Im going to use this for my Phd research.

kyra: So I hear that you have been gathering converts, to support your love for big women.

wavemasta: yeah kyra, I have this friend, we were together in school , and I taught him all my secrets, and yes he has made me proud. Only that he backslid from the cause, and is dating a skinny skinny girl. His excuse was that he didnt want to be with a big chick and think of (you know) all the time. Im not bothered, sooner or later, his true nature will win.

kyra: But wavemasta, that means you might like married women, cus most of them are big, and neglected by their husbands.

wavemasta: Kyra, its funny you should say this. Because someone told me the same thing during my NYSC. But see I don't do married women. Its wrong. I'm even on a vow of celibacy, till I get married.

audience (awwwww hes so sweet)

kyra: You got any funny experiences you'd like to share with us?

wavemasta: yeah during my NYSC, we lived in a duplex, in a compound and the compound had a gate. It got to the extent that the female corpers could predict which girl came to see us based on their appearance, when they came in through the gate. If the girl was average, then they would call any of the others. If she was big (and I mean big) then they would call me. A girl came looking for me, and my next door neigbour called me,to attend to her, even before the girl said she was looking for me. One of the first things the girl asked was how my neighbour knew she was looking for me. I diplomatically avoided answering her question.

(By this time, someone in the audience has fainted from laffing too much)

kyra: Have you been questioned on why ure this way?

wavemasta: yeah people see me with a big mamacita, and ask me if Im strong enough to carry the load. I reply by showing them my muscles. I do sit ups, press ups, and all at the gym, and I lift weights. If my strenght fails, which It wont, theres always energy 2000, or Alhaji Kolaq's herbs (wink wink).
I remember trying to psyche a lepa chick who was a friend of mine, that I could change, and she replied in yoruba "abinibi yato si ability" ( meaning that who you are, and whats inside you, is more powerful than you trying to be someone else.)

kyra: So wavemasta, any last words of advice to the big beautiful women out there?

wavemasta: yeah, to all the lepa ladies, please stop starving yourselves, if u wanna eat that extra helping of chocolate, please please do so. Stop starving yourselves by being anorexic and throwing up last nights dinner.
To all my big honies, dont worry abeg. Most people who see what ure packing are too intimidated by the luggage. They know they aint got the guts to carry it, and so they like to victimize. Next time anyone calls you names, know that hes afraid, he wants you but cant carry the load. And thats why you shouldnt take them seriously, and you should disqualify them. Wait for people like me, the big daddies who can carry the elders load (eru agba).
Don't allow society to set standards for you. Live your life, and love yourself. Stand in front of the mirror and tell yourself youre beautiful, and God made you well.

kyra: Thanks wavemasta.We loved having you on the kyra wanks show. If anyones interested in meeting wavemasta, drop him a comment on his blog. Now up next on the kyra wanks show after the break "Oh my gosh, My dog is gay!!"

Sunday, July 8, 2007


Helppppp I'm studying in the lab, and akom has pulled up his shirt, exposing his bare stomach. The boi is telling me he wants to start going to the gym (while rubbing the stomach). I felt he was speaking his language to his stomach, but he said he was talking to me... Ok, now he has pulled down the shirt showing his stomach, and I dont have to look........
Theres enough jist, including about the club I rocked last friday to celebrate killing my exams, but let me study first......

Friday, July 6, 2007


I had my compiler construction examination yesterday, and this is an examination thats dreaded by most students in my department. In fact,the course is so legendary, that a fraction of people in other departments in my faculty have heard of it. Apart from having a very challenging practical part which takes 70% of the total mark, you also have to sit for a true/false exam, which has 60 questions, and to pass successfully, you got to have 41 to pass. Why? because he dosent divide the marks by 2, as you would have expected, to get the mark over 30. He actually subtracts 30 from your exam score over 60. So if you get 41/60, it translates to you scoring 11/30.
So yeah the first time I wrote the exam, I had 38/60 (8/30) and the dude I taught got 41. It was scary. I made up my mind that I had to pass this bastard once and for all. I simply went and solved all the past exams. I scored low initially, but I would sit down with the book ,and look over my mistakes. So I went through all the past papers.
I had to take a break from this course to study for parallel algorithms, yeah the paper where we got to see "odu" briefly for like 5 mins.
After the crazy exam, I reread my notes and made some little notes of mine. That was the day I switched off my phone, and did like an 8 hour study-athon.
Next day, I went out to see of I could get wasiu (my bike) fixed, and yeah I forgot to mention that hes dead. I got a new bike today, so sweet and blue. Men I use double lock, padlock the thing so that these people no go tiff am, yes oh even for here we get some people wey their body they scratch them so dem go tiff .
So yeah when I got back, I sat down with the answers for the previous exams and crammed. I hate cramming, and I prefer to understand and implement, but this time I was so friggin desperate. I wanted to enjoi my summer hols without anything hanging over my head, you know madam is coming over, and I need to give her "undivided" attention (wink wink). So the day before the exam was used for cramming past answers, and looking for patterns in the exam papers.
Morning of the exam, I woke up, gave thanks to God, and I told him that even if I didnt get what I wanted in the exam, I'd still praise his name. Then I was inspired to resolve those past papers without looking at the answers. Men when I started it was crazy, I was finishing them in like 15 mins and getting 55+ /60, It was like woah. I went on till like one 0 clock, and my exam was scheduled for 2 in the afternoon. I had solved all but one, and for that one I just re-read the answers, and went for lunch.
Men before the exam I was nervous, and so I decided to go ease myself. On my way I met sheila, and it was really windy that day. So I commented on the fact that the days when we write the exams are usually windy, cus thats how it was last time.
Na so the foolish girl talk say that means I still go score 38, i.e I would still fail. Men I was so pissed, I mean some people just open that wide hole in their heads called a mouth and utter arrant nonsense. If na for naija, someone go tear am slap. Men I entered agbero mode for 2 mins and I was like "God punish you", the girl dey laff, dey think say na joke. I calmed myself down, told God I was sorry and all, and I felt the devil was threatened that I was gonna murder the exam, so he sent the chick to misyarn, anyhow sha I pushed the thought out of my head.
I got back to the hall, and they gave us the papers.
When I look the questions, men I begin smile........
See I finished those questions in 10 mins, and It was a 1 hr 30 mins exam. I just dey shade like rocket. I calmed myself down and checked again, cus I know I make silly mistakes at times. Thats how I changed one question from false to true when false was the answer. So sha I left the hall after 30 mins.
Later in the evening they put up the answers to the exam. Thats why I love these people, men if na for naija dem go take time ehn, to release results. I can never forget them releasing first semester 200 level results in first semester 300l. Imagine oh!
Fast foward to today, when they posted the results, and son of man got 53/60. Men I was God. I was the second highest, some dude had 56, but the thing was like , judging from his study number, I could tell that he had taken it times without number, so technically, I was the best in my set, for that exam attempt.....yeah I know I aint gonna get money for that, but it felt good sha.
In fact yesterday one of my friends was telling me she heard my gist of how I left the exam hall in 30 mins. I was like "omo so my legend don spread..."
I thank God and my ability to be flexible. Flexible because I tried another approach to studying. For the first exam I was trying to study the textbook , and all, and I failed. So the moral of this story is two fold---first God rocks, and answers prayers, and secondly be flexible. If you arent getting the results you want, then please change your strategy. If someone told me I would get 53/60, I'd have said he was joking.
I have to go back to writing my paper on "a comparison of Mpeg-4 motion detection architectures" now, cus I just took a break. Vassily, my friend from kazakhstan, accused me some minutes ago of "non-productive" typing in a friendly way.....
This is wavemasta logging out of your networkkkkkkkkk

Tuesday, July 3, 2007

I haven't blogged in ages.....and well I'm sorry and I've been busy. So much has been happening to your friendly neighbourhood crazy nerd, so much that it makes me wonder. These 11 months Ive been here have totally transformed me into a different person, Its really amazing. Anyways enuff about me.......
I had this exam today......parallel algorithms, an exam thats dreaded by students in my department (with good reason, in fact ALL our compulsory courses are dreaded :-)).
I actually passed the first time with a 6, which was like woah to some students cus people just dreamt of passing it, they just wanted to pass, and yeah getting a good grade is meant to be just for jah. But well you know me now, naija man, greedy man, I wanted more, I wanted a higher mark, so men yours truly went and did study group with some italian and spanish guys, initially, I wanted to just cry, cus Ricardo and Ben would simply be speaking italian to themselves, explaining shit, and I'd imagine myself frantically waving my hands and screaming "I'm here, speak in English!!", then Martha, and Yago would begin speaking spanish, and since Ricardo speaks spanish, german, and italian as well as English (Ahhhh opression!) they would begin to speak, and yeah you get the gist.
Wasnt bad, sha, at the end we spoke english and explained a whole lot of stuff to each other. I found out that I learnt more than if I just wanted to do it myself, naija style. Yeah you know how we do it.....If you got knowledge, dont share it, and keep it to yourself so no one scores higher than you, but here, they really dont give a damn. All they are interested is in the knowledge, and its application. I was actually able to teach and explain stuff to people....hmm so I actually DO have something upstairs afterall.......
Anyways, I wrote the exam today, I actually slept well (as opposed to before my C++ and Java exams) and I took it as a good omen. I thanked God........yeah Id been doing a lot of that lately, since the sermon I heard last sunday in church about thanksgiving, and yeah apart from the sermon, I destroyed a whole plate of pounded yam, with egusi, gizzard, chicken, meat (When I see naija food here, I no dey form levels men!) If my mum saw my plate, she would have had a heart attack.
Anyways back to the gist, yeah I entered the exam hall, and they gave us the questions. I saw one question that scared me........cus even though I had prepared for the exam I hadnt seen stuff like that, and the exam had 2 parts which could be taken separately, and I planned on doing both parts together in 3 hrs (which some students here would consider suicidal), but men I be naija boi, eye don tear, dem no get craze, ah ah , nuthin dey happen.
(OK, I've switched off my tout mode....) yeah so I asked my indian friend what he thought, since the exam hadnt started and he began laughing, and I saw that most people in the class were friend is like "the answers for part 1 have been stapled to the question paper"......I was like WTF? sharply, I entered naija boi agbero mode, and opened the thing, and lo and behold, it was there.
Men I activated my dubbing no jutsu technique (for naruto fans), since Im a special nerd, I can copy things at the speed of light, but since Im realli intelligent, I seldom use that technique, I prefer to just rely on ma natural brainz.
So I checked it out and it was true, and I just had time to glance at the thing that was bothering me, before they took away our papers and called the prof in charge.
If na for naija, dem for cancel the exam. Not so for Prof....the guy just tore the answers off the question papers and redistributed the thing. The prof na sharp guy, in no get time for wahala.
So I finished part 1 in 30 mins, (yeah u can congratulate me later, I know I rock), and did the part 2. I had to think and bust ma brainz, and I was able to solve 2 out of 3 questions. For the one I had problems with, I solved it in 2 different ways, and wrote on ma paper "Dear sir, I'm a bit confused, please pick the best solution", oyibo people are free, and thats why I like em. Go try am for naija, you no go graduate.
I finished, and then I discovered I made some silly mistakes, and I was afraid that I mightnt score as high as I wanted, and yeah I remembered the pastors sermon and began praising God and all, but my heart was still heavy. I fashied it and gave thanks to him, and I told God this morning that I appreciated all he did for me, and even if I didnt meet my goal, I'd still give him thanks.
I was tired, but I had another exam (compiler construction) on friday also dreaded by Computer Engineering students, and If I normally sleep in the daytime, I get massive guilt attacks, as if "yeah ure meant to be working and not sleeping". So I watched like 3 episodes of "heroes", chatted with a friend, who revealed what I'd always suspected about her feelings for yours truly (fine boi, omo mummy) , and then I went to work.
I have been having some issues with julie and all, like I put in my former posts, and then some really hard core shit began flashing into ma brain when I was writing my exams this morning, it was like crazy, and I could almost hear some whispers telling me all my hard work for this exam wasnt gonna pay off, but men I rejected all that in Jesus name....but even after the exam I still felt the effects ..........Watching heroes made me take my mind off all that.
I needed time to study, and I got to the library, and switched off my phone,(and as I write this, it is still off...), and I did a marathon.........from 3 .00 pm approx till like 11.30 pm approx, I took breaks for dinner and all.
I really needed to meditate, and so I listened to Anthony Robbins, awaken the giant within. I downloaded it, using my methods, and I listened to what he had to say, I will share it with you briefly. He talked about how we as human beings have beliefs that either empower or disempower us......beliefs about ourselves, people, relationships, etc, that have been subconsiously fed to us, ,maybe by religion, society, or tradition (ok, that lines mine, not tonys), so I made a list of all the
disempowering beliefs I had, about myself , my abilities, and everything, and I was shocked at how much shit we accumulate in our subconscious minds, I dug really deep and came up with stuff that was inside me that I didnt even know was there.
I prayed to God and asked him to help me get rid of those beliefs, and get new empowering ones. Then I wrote down some goals that were important to me, my life, my career, etc. And yeah my fone was still switched off. I was really pissed off, and didnt want to lash out at anyone by accident, or transfer anger, and yeah I learnt a new technique for dispelling negative feelings and thoughts , from Anthony Robbins, well I didnt use his own exactly, I created mine.
When crazy thoughts enter my head, I just imagine someone pressing a detonator, and a huge explosion rocks the screen of my mind, destroying the negative picture. Or some times I visualize small explosions on different parts of the screen of my mind, destroying the picture, or even better, just imagine some dude with a razor blade scratching and tearing down the picture in your mind, but visualize the picture as a paper picture.
I covered 11 lectures out of 14 in the lecture slides, and yes I will finish up tomorrow, but Im going out with someone to repair wasiu (my bicycle). The guy has been retired long enough, and Im gonna fix him tomorrow. The rusty bike which was graciously loaned to my by my iranian acquaintance (not friend, I mean yeah he gave me some persian vodka, but puh-leassse!), has been returned to the owner, who suddenly decided he wanted to sell.
If I gist you about that bicycle If you pedal too fast, the chain comes off, and since its rusty, you get rust on your hands. So just imagine if youre gonna see a fine fine yarinya, and youre wearing a white tuxedo.............except if your dads name is bill gates, or youre the son of an oil sheikh from the middle east, your own don finish.
And I know some guys wanna yab me and say "han han Ade, you f** up oh, for naija you dey drive motor, for holland you dey ride bike"......well its the primary means of transport, everyone, including my professors have bikes, and yeah cars are only used for long distances.
Just TRY, if dem born you well , TRY, riding a bicycle to your girlfriends house in naija. Check this out

1. The gateman go disgrace you, onto say in only go primary school, and you get degree.

2. Na stone dem go use chase you comot from the house.

3. Your own family go carry you go deliverance, you know those men in white robes who will scrape your head with an unsterilized blade, and wash your head with water.

Whew!!! Men Men...............lastly before I go, remember I said I sent an email to my parents talking about how I felt growing up, and the experiences I passed through, and the hurts, and the way I saw things back then, and they replied, and told me that, well though I might have "exaggerated" a bit (Well we know African parents must have the last word), but they were sorry, and they were glad I forgave myself and them, and they did everything out of love and no hard feelings.
They were happy I got all these off my chest, and were like....If I felt like talking , I could call em anytime. They were also like, who else can I call a witch, except my own parents, and they won't eat me up? Well of course I dont call my parents names, but yeah I'm happy, I'm moving on with my life, slowly but steadily, dropping the excess baggage from my past, and thanks to the special person who made all this possible. At least my parents see me as grown up and matured now, and thats I just have to build my own crib and run....... lol!

Gotta go....I have to brush my teeth, and I got another episode of "heroes" with my name on it.... I know, I just know that I'm a mutant and I got special powers.....

And yeah my phone is still off.......