Monday, December 31, 2007

Looking Back on 2008

This is another of my "vision posts", so don't get confused....I am basically writing the script for 2008, and looking back at it from the future...

I will always remember 2008, as my year of moving to a new level. I think God laid it on my heart that I was gonna rise higher, cus 2007, was kinda a year of me knowing myself, fighting inner wars and all, and as the year drew to a close, I knew 2008 was gonnna be a blast..
I remember the final pieces of wisdom I got through God from reading some books, close to the end of the year 2007 when I took time off, and realizing I had the power to change my life, in my hands. I remember beginning the year 2008, filled with energy, and all of a sudden things began working out for me like magic. I began attracting new ideas and new innovations for my masters project. I remember my prof being wowed by my ideas, and wanting me to do PHD, but me deferring because of my dreams. 2008 was fun, I began getting 9's in courses I did, and ended up with an average of 8 and above and graduating with a distinction, something which no one in my department had had for ages.
I remember focusing on loving my self and the love I had for madam so intensely it transformed our relationship, and I remember the feeling of getting on the plane to see her, and just being wowed by how she looked so so fine.....we sorted out all issues and had a lovely holiday, and I tried so hard to control myself and not be naughty, but you know me now...
I remember how money just began flowing into my life, and I settled my financial issues in such a little while, just in the beginning of the year.
I look back on myself, and I realize that 2007 was me in a cocoon, and 2008 was when I unleashed... I gained control over my mind and was able to focus it on what I wanted, instead of negative stuff...I also remember 2007, writing down my requests on a form and giving it to someone to pray over it for me in church..
I remember receiving my diploma with distinction, amidst applause from students, and the whole school, and the African community giving me an award, telling me I'd done them proud. I remember my colleagues and classmates looking at me like I was a miracle, they couldn't comprehend it.
I remember calling madam n telling her the good news, and telling her thanks so much, and she was so stunned that she cud have that effect on someone else..
I discovered what I like doing, and landed my dream job, earning millions, and everyone in my family, and around me knew I was able to stand on my own...I could travel wherever, and do whatever...
I remember people using my whole life story to illustrate that life does not give you what you deserve, it gives you what you demand, and hold with the power of your mind.
It illustrated that you can get whatever you want in life as long as you do not give up. I remember the joy I felt as success after success just began pouring into my life, as if the heavens just opened, whereas the blessings had already been there, they were just waiting for me to open the door.....
Gotta go, madam is rubbing my stomach again, she needs serious spanking.....wink wink

Tuesday, December 25, 2007

Yeah I'm back,got too many things on my mind......had wahala with the madam, basically its over, yeah. Dnt get it wrong, it had happened before but trust me, I was trying to look for reasons and do damage control.....lets just say my instincts told me there was a reason apart from what she mentioned and I was right.......I did blame myself, I was an ass, but well, I gotta just press foward and focus on the koko(graduation and excessive cash), painful sha ,cus men I neva lurved b4, but.....I don't wanna quote Eminem here...
So I'm thinking about so so many things, learning d lessons, tryina 4get the details..Well I will make myself better n improve.....and still keep my self respect. Cus I knw peeps who do worse..some very hurtful things were said, by her, and by me also, hey, when I screw up, I admit it men, I dont claim holy...but some of those things that were said by her hurt like hell. Seems lyk relationships for me only work if I want a short term thingy,then most of the stuff which made me an ass wouldn't have occurred cus I wudn't give a damn, but for serious relationships, issues, and gbege just come up.......anyways men, I still chop chicken and small wine for xmas, we gats to gyrate small....There were things said I shouldn't have said, and things done that I shouldn't have done..but I don't regret it happening, it was cool, funny, strange, and fun while it lasted,If I had a choice, I'd do it all over, so sweets, if u read this....its a pity u got ur mind set, and I cant force u, my previous attempts to beg u ended up with me being treated like a pest..am sure it was a matter of time b4 u brought out "Raid" pesticide.

Anyways on a lighter note, I found this tight video by a group called "Resonance", and its called "chinwe Ike", tight gospel jam, feel the video..

xmas post

Merry xmas to all. I am feeling quite lazy, but son of man just feels the need to write down something today. I'm at my bros place, thank Jah they have wireless, so I'm still connected to my lifeblood(The Internet). Todays bin cool so far, bin playin with my little nephews, I got some xmas presents, in the form of a cd holder, and some pjs..Am so thankful to God, cus I know back home, some pple are just celebrating xmas under bridges, so I am grateful to him, and the reason for the season(his son Jesus Christ).
I have had a lot of time to reflect over 2007. 2007 was a year of discovery, a year of love, joy, pain, and sorrow. One of those periods a person has to pass through, when he comes face to face with the darkness within, and faces himself, and battles it out, for change. A period when I met and maybe pushed away an angel, a period where lessons were learnt, when I learnt who I really was inside...
Now its xmas day, 2007. Your crazy nerd has spent 1 yr and 5 months in this foreign land......I am so different from the dude who stepped off the KLM flight from Nigeria, almost 2 yrs back.
God has brought me through so many things, loving me for me, teaching me lessons, bringing me through trials. Now I have finished all my coursework, including courses where pple fail and are held back. Now its just that I want to improve some grades (u know say Naija man be greedy man).
I know am gonna graduate from here early next yr, with a distinction hopefully, get to the next level, amen.
I am gonna enjoy this holiday cus when I get back to school, I am gonna work like I have never worked before, so I get out.
I gotta reach the top, its just my destiny. Heck, I already at the top, I'm just securing my inheritance...
Then I just pray God helps me meet the one special person, and make all the hurt Ive caused go away.....

I got stuff for 2008, but I will leave that till then.

Merry Xmas everyone.......make I try out em pyjamas....oh I 4got, its just about hitting 12 noon....lolz

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Omo men, enough things have been happening to son of man, e no easy. Firstly I am doing this thesis of a thing. In this school, you cannot afford to ask foolish questions of your supervisor, make in no think say you be mumu, so most times, we are just in the dark, or basically, we are forced to think for ourselves. I guess its good training.
Well sha, son of man has his issues, I gotta think about making extra cash, sorting out my life, planning where I wanna be after this, etc.
As per the cash, I found out the money the school was payin for tuition and the cash I am getting for my thesis isnt enough to pay rent and tuition combined together. Imagine them, awon ole(tiff), they r deducting more than they give me, and making out the extra as "Health Insurance", shey dem tell me say I get sickness? I be african man now, I no fit sick. So I am in negotiations to work out something, like a job, etc.
I had a sort of arrangement with my coordinator but the man don tire, in don transfer to another school, so son of man dey on in own.....
Xmas is coming, and like always, all I can say is that men, make all this festivities be gotten over with and all. I desperately need a haircut, but the clipper wey I bring from naija don spoil, now I resemble animal.
Paying the price for what you wanna achieve ain't easy, Last nyt after a hard days work of coding, I felt a bit low, esp as I had seen just 2 digits in my acct. I now hollaed one of my boiz in naija, men the guy dey inside party, dem dey blast "yahooze", damn, I wanted to just quench, bros dey kill his ass on top foreign Msc, and guys dey baraje somewhere. Anyways sha, its all good.
About my relationship or whateva, well sha, its on hold for now, I've tried all I can, and its takes 2 to "tongolo". I'm here whenever she needs me, but I got to sort out my own ish. All I am doing now is trying to be responsible and stay outta trouble. I have just been turning down invites to shine congo, of course its "pay as u go", but well I gotta be responsible, but e no easy, serious aggro dey hook the son of man, and no be book go warm person for this winter season.
Anyways sha, Jah go everyly support his own, he is faithful, so nuthin dey happen.
Its good to hustle hard like Nas said, and neva give up.....and like a person dear to me once told me..."its when ure close to the finish line that it seems tougher."
Anyways, I know its just gotta work out, everything good just has to come my way...thats the way it is.

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

Revelations

This is just a short overview of stuff thats been happening anyways. Today , my partner and I finished the second part of that crazy compiler construction assignment, this is thanks to waking up at crazy hours and working like dogs, but we are done. Now it is certain that your friendly neighborhood nerd is gonna graduate next year. I got this weakness when It comes to solving problems and projects. Yeah, the great eficco i.e me, has a weakness, and its that I get intimidated when I am faced with a large project, then I get anxious and panicky, but the thing is that somehow I always pull through, I dont know why. I was walking around in my room, and I stumbled across a universal principle which I will share with you.

The thing is that in this world we live in, we got principles that have been tested over time, and the principle is that if I want to move from A to B, and I take steps to move me 4ward each day, I must (MUST) eventually reach my destination. I heard this like a voice in my mind, and I was agonizing over the snail-like speed at which my project was moving. So I am gonna just relax, and put in steps everyday to make sure I move 4ward, now I know I'm gonna leave here next yr...YAY!
Now enough of the deep yarns, well whats being happening, I'm trying so hard to get my madam back, this is someone I had this deep spiritual connection with, so bad that when I felt it was broken I lost control and fell into the lowest pit of human depravity, anyways Im trying to get her back.....I talked to Jah about it, and asked him for wisdom to do the right thing, and I am sure he has done it. I feel so cut off and detached, its crazy, but sha God na your eye we dey look.

They have paid me for my thesis both for November and December, so thank God I can pay my rent, and do my laundry for the first time in 3 week (Abeg no laff oh!) . Also today it seems as if I was destined for a lot of revelations, cus I attended this lecture by a prof from MIT called Ken Morse and he stimulated my mind with so many ideas. I feel now my life has a direction and I know where I am going, and I can feel now that my life is gonna be different, and I won't just be another flash in the pan. Anyways Xmas is coming around soon, and I have no plans yet, maybe to go chill at my Bros place, and all, then new year, I would still be at my Bros place and then Later I will go to some friends place and then chop his turkey....
Anyways men, whatever will be will be, and God will bless us all.....

Saturday, December 8, 2007

just there

I want to write this before I go hunting for dodo in the Arab shop...Men, a lotta stuff has been happening in my life....so much that I cannot even begin writing em here, since people know who I am an what my blog is about. Lets just say that I recently broke an Iron clad principle of mine, and Its difficult for me to 4give myself, but anyways sha. What about the madam? Well lets just say that I don't know, really men, I'm just in a crazy state right now......
Anyways sha, what else has been happening? My thesis project is moving along slowly and steadily, and I guess Gods bein tryin to make me cool down and not panic when I look at the sheer amount of work facing me, Instead I just gotta break it down and take it little by little. Its December, and I have spent over a year here, omo son of man wants to just graduate and move on men...
A lot of things disturb me about the future, the thing is that I am good academically (Haters, na you sabi), and Im also good in the field.....and the choice is whether to think of a PhD or just go and work, of which I got very nice offers.
The thing is that while having a "Dr" title appended to your name sounds realli realli cool, I aint sure about spending another 4 years away from Naija.....and I want cash, cold hard cash, and Im not ashamed to say it. I also want to like start up a company and other ish, and get married in like 2 years , yes now, agro is not good oh!! In this white man land, if u get full tank and you no fit unload, men you go do some kin things.
Another thing is the lonliless you feel here, even though people say you might get used to it, but I'm a social person, and that has been hard for me to adjust to. Imagine waking up in the morning and looking at the four walls of your room, no one to talk to except God, and everyone around you is carrying their own cross, and thinking , "Öh crap, I have to write code."
I also dont want to be a stranger in my own land......I dream of lekki mansions, hummer jeeps, and carrying my girlfriend/fiancee/wife to watch Jazzman olofin, p-square, and Night of a thousand laughs. Am I crazy...nah, just a realist, who knows what he wants. I'm scared I might do the academic thing, maybe when I get a distinction here, I might get pressurized into doing it, I might lose my chick (if I havent lost her already) cus she might want to get married and all, and 4 years of my life go just go like that, ontop kpali, and on the other hand, I don't want to be thinking, hmmm na wa oh, " Dr " in my name sounds nice.
Anyways sha, for now, I have chosen the way of getting a job and seeing what life has to offer. I gots to get pepper, thats the main koko. If you need inspiration, just listen to Akon (The sweetest girl), and hear what he said abt cash... :-)
Yeah, I know cash can't buy happiness, but this eficco here knows that its better being unhappy in a Mansion, and feeling the blast from a samsung AC on your body, watching Television from your new Phillips Aurea TV, than for you to be unhappy inside one face me I face you, at the mercy of PHCN, and living in a room close to the public toilet which no one flushes.
Anyways, I gotta go and shop. My scholarship guys are messing up again, and the monthly payment for my thesis hasnt come in, so I better go and buy beans and plaintain (thank God for arabo), so son of man no go starve.
Safe y'all.