Friday, March 20, 2009

o4kasibe!

This week has been one helluva week. Lets see where to start.
I have been adjusting to single life, with its ups and downs. Since I let anaconda out of his cage, hes been breathing in fresh air, and trying to attune himself to his surroundings. Unfortunately he hasn't been able to 'feed' yet. Poor guy. I keep trying to reassure him that soon, he will feed and feed well.
Now, I've been listening to DJ ZEEZ, and this guy is the ish..his songs are so tight with sick beats, and his songs are mostly in yoruba, as in street yoruba, and he is an ibo dude, born n bred in Lagos.. a bariga boy to be exact.
I stumbled on this hit jam 'o4kasibe' and I was tripped. 'o4kasibe' means that your deeds will be known in all the four cardinal points of the earth. Anyways sha, I set it for my ring tone. Now at todays toastmasters meeting, I Was assigned the role of 'wordmaster'. This means I get to pick a word, and talk about it, and people who make speeches try to use that word in their speech, and its my job to track how many people use it. So our theme for tonight was 'exploring the senses' and the word I chose for the day was 'sensual'. For you to be reading my blog, I know you're intelligent so don't ask me what it means. If you wanna know, ask afrobabe, ibiluv, or badderchic, and please sisters I love u all, don't come here and kill me oo..lol...
Anyways, we first did whats called a table topic session. They call you out and you have to make a speech about something, sharp sharp. This evening, when they call you out, they blindfold you, and give you an object, tell you if its edible or not, and then you guess what it is. After then, you get the blind taken off, then you talk about what you held. When it was my turn, I was blind folded, and something round was put in my hands. Now it wasn't long and hard, if so, I for swear for dem mama, and it wasn't large and soft...else I would have...
Instead it turned out to be small and round and hard, and it was a tangerine. When I gave my freestyle speech it was about how tangerines could, in addition to its primary purpose (food), be used in a sensual way, between man and woman. I mentioned I didn't know about tangerines, and man and man, but no one caught the joke.
Na so I Dey in the meeting, when person call me. And guess what my ringtone is 'o4kasibe'. Chei! I wanted to bury my head in embarrassment! It happened twice during someones speech.Luckily my caller stopped and I was able to put it in vibrate during the time for the speech applauses, because the phone was in my coat, and my coat was at the end of the room.
So, there I was looking fly, emi fine boi, lookin sexy, next thing, as I dey beside this fine woman who just gave a speech about sleepy hollow, na so I mess.
The mess I messed was silent, and deadly. When I realized I had violated the UN peace treaty, I almost began praying that 'Please God, let this fart move the opposite way'. Cus the way this oyibo womans nose looked, ehn, e be like say in fit detect am.
So, in order to get to my meeting on time, I had to take a taxi, which was my last card. Luckily I got a return ticket, and when I got to my city, I felt I cud bobo a taxi to carry me home then I'd pay him back on monday. Lailai, dem no gree. I had tried all my cards, credit, debit, to get some small cash, nuthin happen.
Well, After crying to God for help, I walked to the bus driver for the bus going my way, waited till I Was the last, and begged him to let me ride.
If you are reading this, then I got home safe...lol...there are still kind people out there, and I made sure I took the exit close to him so I could say good night to him. Thanks Opa (grandad) for helping out. Shows there are still nice people around.
This weekend I will just stay indoors. I made some financial decisions which put me in my present predicament, like looong fone calls to my ex using my former contract fone line...but you know now, I was in lurve...lol..you women have us guys on lockdown, so quit the feminist bullshit, and accept the fact that you are different and not inferior. But una get wayo, one time, woman go talk say, she be feminist and wants 'equal rights', but in Nigeria, she can block the road with her car, and can shout, 'I'm a woman' and you can't do jack. A woman did that to us, and all of us had to reverse. And there was no car behind her.
God save us ooo..

12 comments:

Confessions of a London gal said...

1STTTTT!!!!

Confessions of a London gal said...

2ND!!!
Lemme go read!

Confessions of a London gal said...

o 4kasibe 4kasibe 4kasibe!!! I love the song too- One of me crazy close friends got me hooked on him! Lemme continue reading! lol

RocNaija said...

ori e o4kasibeee! lol
hated it when i first heard it.. like it now though

RocNaija said...

nice post.. good to hear you no waka reach house..
even though everything happens for a reason..
you fit waka make u bump into person wey go help u forget the sorrows of your ex.. ;-D

Power of positive thinking!!

Confessions of a London gal said...

Oh well, you know what they say, women! Cant do with 'em cant do without 'em...Necessary evil et all.

@RocNaija- Ahn ahn- for road at night?

*Logging on to youtube, looking for 04kasibe*

Bemgba Nyakuma said...

Nice post man. Sorry to hear about the "Kudi Wahala" nd the "Saga of the Mess", ne-ways, guess you be more careful. About the song, I will listen to it let you, esp cos you've criticized all my song suggestions to you in the past. You shud listen to this one, it was written, voiced and produced by a class mate of mine, he is off d shee...Z http://www.zshare.net/audio/57137367d7daf196#

Afrobabe said...

I personally call my self a feminist till it's time to pay....

Eya, glad you got home safely...I hate this country I tell you...

Tangerine....sensual...senual tangerine..hmmmmmm ideas!!!

miz-cynic said...

Dnt like dat song.i prefer sayo.dat shit has hapend 2 me b4,i begged d conductor o

exschoolnerd said...

u single? wetin happen nau?

i like the song have u heard his oda song BOBBE FC..i prefer it sha..its really funny!

Chari said...

LMAO!!!!

ori e fokasibe!!!!

love all the songs in his new upcoming album including the track he did with Sauce Kid...nice...

wavemasta said...

@Chari, yeah I got that song with saucekid, its too much...naija got talent!